This morning I was disappointed with myself for something I didn't do yesterday that I feel I should've done, and my thoughts were telling me that God must be disappointed with me and not pleased with me, and how could I have been disobedient after all He's done for me, how could I ever expect Him to fill me with His Holy Spirit again, or answer any of my prayers, etc. , when I suddenly decided these thoughts had to stop.
I went into my bedroom and prayed, asking for my Father's forgiveness once more (I had asked last night) and help, and as I sat in tears, God reminded me that He never changes--that He loves me just as much today as He did yesterday. That He wasn't surprised at what happened. That He knew it would happen before I did. That He formed me in my mother's womb and knew me better than myself. That I can never earn His love by my obedience--that my righteousness is as filthy rags. So the only thing left for me to do was believe I was His child and my sins were forgiven. To believe the verse that says, "Never will I leave you, never will I forsake you." Or I could refuse to believe and wallow in self-pity. (Been there, done that!) I got up off my knees with the song "Great is Thy Faithfulness" singing in my heart. I felt so much better! "How great is the love the Father has lavished on us...." (1 John 3:1) We can't earn it, and we can't lose it. Praise God! And we owe this wonderful relationship all to Jesus! All because of what Jesus did for us on the cross! Praise the Lord!!!