July 4th, we took my oldest son (32 yrs old) to the hospital for acute abdominal pain, fever, nausea. He had a CT scan, xrays and an ultrasound which all came back normal. His blood test, however, did not. His regular doctor made arrangments for him to see a specialist. Yesterday, we sat in the Outpatient waiting room while our son had an endoscopy and colonoscopy. The results showed he had the beginnings of a stomach ulcer, but the specialist didn't think it was what caused the intense pain. This morning we took him for a dye test on his gall bladder. He has an appointment on the 25th with the specialist to find out the results. In the meantime, they want him to stay off work and rest. He went back to his apartment today after spending the night with us since the hospital wouldn't let him drive after the procedure he had yesterday.
God has been giving me such peace throughout all this. And energy. While waiting today, I reviewed some of my Bible verse cards. These two spoke to my heart:
Yet I am always with you; you hold me by my right hand. You guide me with your counsel, and afterward you will take me into glory. Whom have I in heaven but you? And earth has nothing I desire besides you. My flesh and my heart may fail, but God is the strength of my heart and my portion forever.
But as for me, it is good to be near God. I have made the Sovereign LORD my refuge.
Jeremiah 31:3-4 I have loved you with an everlasting love; I have drawn you with lovingkindness. I will build you up again.
I decided I needed to work on memorizing these two passages. I need to pray them and ask God to help me internalize their meaning. More than anything I want to remember each day that my God is always with me and that He has me in His hands. As I ask each day for my daily bread, I know He will provide me with His counsel and provision in all things. I feel as though my flesh and my heart have failed on many stressful occasions...and yet, I am still here. My God has strengthened me.
I dwelt on Jeremiah 31:3-4 the longest. God's love for me and for all of us is everlasting. He draws us to Him with lovingkindness either from His Word, those He puts in our path, or from His own presence as we go through desert times seeking Him. My heart clings to "I will build you up again". My God knows I need rebuilding, times of refreshing from the Lord. I am a work in progress, His "masterpiece" as Eph. 2:10 tells us, and He promises in verse 4 that He will complete the work He began in me--in all of us. I give Him praise today!